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  • Writer's pictureKristen Taylor

Your thoughts, the most important thing you can learn to control

Determine what you want and be prepared for battle with your greatest enemy to get it being fully aware that your greatest enemy is your own mind. — N. Hill

The greatest hindrance to living the life of our dreams is our own mind.


The reality in which we live is created by how our brains have interpreted all the experiences in our life. Most of this happens while our minds are left to work on autopilot. We never think twice about the ability we have to shape or change it.


As a society, we are more fixated on shaping our external environment and how others view us than our internal environment and how we view ourselves. We spend more time and money working on how we look than how we feel.


One of the most important aspects of being happy, being kind to ourselves, should be virtually effortless and not to mention, is completely free. In fact, the effort of being kind to others is so minimal we give it away all the time and often to people we hardly know.


Does this all sound like a load of B-S? Is it hard to accept this truth? The ability to change how you perceive all that you have and all that you are is totally within your control.


Don’t believe me, believe the numbers.


Changing our reality is big business. It feeds on the same principles. Grandview Research states:

The global personal development market size was valued at USD 41.81 billion in 2021 and is anticipated to expand at a compound annual growth rate (CAGR) of 5.5% from 2022 to 2030. The growing emphasis on acquiring new skills, such as social skills and decision-making skills, for self-improvement, personal development, and gaining self-recognition is a major factor expected to drive the market growth over the forecast period.

We spend billions of dollars every year to learn how to change into someone we want to be when really all we need to change is our perception of the person we already are.


Our perception is simply our interpretation of our experiences. A perception that started being formed since we were born. If we grew up in an environment that told us we were smart and successful then that becomes the reality we know. If we grew up in an environment that told us we were inferior and worthless, our brains accepted that as truth which becomes our reality.


What is possible for our lives is learned. Those learned responses that started very early in our childhood become harder to change over time because we are asking ourselves to change our reality. All we have ever known. The reality our minds created. Most of us are not even conscious of this process until later in life where we look up and ask ourselves, “how did I get here?” Some call it a “mid-life” crisis.


Changing our reality is uncomfortable and scary. We all desire to belong. Similar to when you move to a new town or start a new job, it feels awkward at first. You feel out of place and it takes time to get your bearings. Over time you adapt and you become comfortable in your new surroundings. It eventually becomes home and your new reality. This is the same process when “moving” into a new “realm” of your life. It feels strange before it feels normal.


Prepare to ward off the inclination to resort to self-sabotage. Give yourself time to become acclimated before you thinking about reverting back to what you know. Remember that growth can be painful and you do not respect what is not earned.

Everything we experience is all just made up in our minds. Every thought, every memory, the way we process our daily routines, all subjective. The way one person sees an event versus another is totally different because their minds have been shaped by the experiences of their lives.


If you consciously participate in how you interpret your reality, you can live a life as great as you can imagine. It is all up to you. You are the only one who can control how you perceive your life.


Would you rather live the life of an unremarkable person with mediocre luck or a rich, remarkable life of favor? The difference between those two realities is all in our own heads. We make it all up.


Do you think your neighbor or co-worker has it all? Maybe the celebrity or influencer you follow on social media has the life you wish you could lead. Someone else is looking at you thinking the same thing.


If only we had been taught this in school when growing up. That we have the ability to change our perception of the events in our lives. That we can control our minds to shape the world we live in instead of just letting our minds shape it for us.


Who better to change your mind than you?


***And let me remind you to believe in the phenomenon that occurs when you combine desire, faith, and simple planning to catapult yourself into the realm of all things possible.

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